Happy New Year!

I have quite a good feeling about this year. Some of you might be thinking that it's a tad too early to make such a prediction but after feeling like you've been dragged to hell and back it can only get better. At the beginning of 2013 I told my friends that "this isn't going to be my year" and oh boy was it not. Nothing had happened to make me have such a feeling so I guess you can call it a woman's intuition. 2013 was hands down the most hardest, saddest and most heart-breaking year of my life. I actually sat on my bed yesterday on New Year's Eve and had a good cry as I reflected back on the year and everything I had been through. As they say, what doesn't kill you only makes you stronger.

I know that I've come a long way from what feels like the most darkest times of my life. I remember I used to shut myself away in my room and spend my days crying and sleeping. I was so severly stressed that I could just about manage to force myself to eat a few spoons of food per day. I really do feel as if I lost a part of myself and I'm yet to get it back. On the plus I learnt a great deal about myself, some of which I already knew and some of which surprised me. I learnt that no matter how much a person may hurt me, if you are someone who I dearly and deeply love, I will do anything for you. Even if it destroys me in the process, I will allow it to. That which it did. I learnt that I'm extremely tolerant and forgiving to those I truly care for and that no matter how upset I may be I will put my feelings aside to ensure that things are okay. I learnt that I do not truly understand the value of myself and this is something that I'm working on.

Hmm that could be a potential New Year's resolution but I've never really been one to make them so will not be making any this year either. Instead I'm going to focus on getting better and being happy as I've been sad for the most longest time and I still very much am. It's definitely much more easier said than done but I intend to make this year a memorable one and for all of the right reasons.

I wish all of you lovely readers a happy new year, one that is filled with happiness and one that is better than your last. X

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